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The Expectation Trap..


My son and I were having a conversation regarding people we missed in our lives. And out of that conversation came some revelation about our expectations in relationships. The next evening this conversation would result in a test because we all know in life if you talk the talk, you should also walk the walk. I had a specific expectation in my mind of a perfect outing, and I did not share it with anyone or seek feedback. I went full steam ahead without considering anyone else’s thoughts or feelings because, in my mind, this was perfect. There were some facts that I should have considered, namely a specific circumstance I completely forgot about because of my expectation. As my son pointed out these facts, I reacted in frustration because my expectations were the most important. We were both frustrated, and neither of us felt heard or that the other person was trying to understand their position. Both of us had cavalier attitudes about each other’s position. I soon realized that I was being dismissive and not considering his feelings. I had to put my expectation down to hear my son. Letting go of my expectations was not easy; it was necessary. I went to God with my frustration, and He showed me I was wrong. Then I saw myself displaying the same behavior patterns we spoke about previously. I was not only allowing this rift because I did not stop and consider his position or feelings. I contributed to it.


In Galatians 6:2, we are reminded that we are to “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ.” So, I now had to sit down and apologize for my dismissive behavior and acknowledge that it was not the person I wanted to be. This courageous communication saved the evening. I am here to encourage you today to examine your expectations. We all must keep honest communication lines open to avoid an opening for the enemy in our lives or our relationships. The expectation trap can disrupt the most precious gifts that Christ has given us, His sacrifice, and others. This year has been one of tremendous personal growth for me. I understand that growth can be life changing and evolutionary if the lessons taught are applied both spiritually and emotionally. I would dare say that I learned a lot more about myself this year than in previous years.


I invite you to join the conversation and share what life lessons you have learned in 2020 and how you will apply them in 2021.


Remember, God loves you, and so do I.

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