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An Open Ended Apology


This upcoming week I know I owe someone an apology, and as I wrestle with the realities of this. And ponder over just the right words to say to this person to express my sincerest regret. God is so faithful to me. He saw that my heart was in a posture of seeking, therefore, He led me to a conversational thread on how to apologize, could it have been a coincidence, possibly. However, my belief is that it was God confirming what needed to be done. The thread provided a diagram of the steps of a good apology. This conversational thread can be found on linkedin it states the following: (a Admit your mistakes, b. say I’m sorry, c. share how it won’t happen again.) As you can imagine it sparked a conversation and provoked thought. There was one important component missing for me, seeking the forgiveness of the person I offended. When true repentance is sought, I believe seeking forgiveness is an automatic factor. Trust is a hard thing to regain once it is lost, from a humanistic vantage point. Seeking forgiveness from the party you offended is one of the first steps on the road to reconciliation. I believe that is in large part because there is still doubt about what is in the heart of the person apologizing. Hurt is like a hammer, striking an object it may not always break the object, but it causes damage. With God this is not an issue because He knows what is in our heart. As I ponder over the right words to use, to convey my heart, to this person. I am reassured that God knows the heart. This realization brings great joy, because He is not looking for us to use the right words. He is looking for a sincere heart posture of repentance. There is a possibility with humans that even with a right heart that they may not accept your apology, this is not so with God. In 2nd Chronicles 7:14 this is evident it is written “ If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” As children of God we are called to have a contrite heart posture, as stated in Psalm 51: 17 “My sacrifice, O God is a broken spirit a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.” I believe David understood that the most important thing in life is a right relationship with God. And the fact that he uses the word sacrifice solidifies that for me because, it takes sacrifice for many of us to go against our human nature to just walk away when things get hard or challenging. Or when we don’t get our own way or when what we want does not line up with the will of God. David understood that true sacrifice was admitting and accepting that God’s way is the way period. Let me interject here, there are extreme reasons to walk away from unhealthy relationships or abusive relationships. In some cases, there are relationships that have ran their course in your life and it’s time to move on, no hurt feelings the relationships have simply come to an end. God will show you when that time comes, in some relationships He will remove the person. Getting back on topic, as children of God we are called to follow the word of God regardless of the sacrifices as stated in Romans 12:18-19 “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written it is mine to avenge; I will repay, says the Lord.” The world has many different opinions on how to show up in life. God simply has one, allow Him to guide, and He will direct your path.


Let’s stop today and think about any relationships that need to be repaired, let’s do our part in as much as it’s up to us, and let God do His.

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